I want to go back to school. I have said this before and probably will continue to say it until I either put my money where my mouth is or just completely give up on the idea of going back. When I do start looking at schools it doesn't jive with the idea that's in my head as to what it is that I am looking for. It could be that I am out of touch with basic reality on a number of levels such as how basic things are done such as going (back) to school. Or it could just be the fact that it has been quite a while since I've actually enrolled that I have no idea where I should start. It could also be the fact that I have become too comfortable in my daily routine that I have frozen? seized up? Become to afraid to do anything about my particular situation in life that taking risks seem ludicrous? The answers could all be yes.
Look, I want to go back, do actually something with myself than just scraping at the near bottom of the barrel. So I don't feel like complete shit when I am old and retired after 75 years of working away. I want to know that I found something that I actually wanted to do, figure out how to get payed to do it and do it.
Simple as that.
I just don't want to have to wade through the shit to do it. And that is a major fault that I have. Aside from sloth. I just want to glance at something, have it give me the necessary information and requirements (if any) and then let me decide weather I am interested in doing it or not or if it's just something of a fascination.
I know, I know... where's the ultimate fun in that? A life with out struggle is no life at all type rhetoric? All the people who are at the top have had to struggle at some point and with some aspect of who they are right? Maybe I am just too damn lazy? Just wanting to seek out the easiest life possible.
I know if I do go back to school it wont be easy, chances are I have to upgrade my math and sciences. C student in High school. Probably a few things as well. Wasn't given my brothers gift for actually excelling in school. Kind of jealous of that actually. Not only that but I am in the process of getting married as well so gonna have to figure out time after the marriage to go back to school. Not only that but there are finances to work out as well.
Let me tell you. Being in your thirties, wanting to go back to school, getting married (if you aren't already) is going to be a challenge. Not impossible. You just need a plan of attack for personal life, financial life, marriage life etc. and hope to God that you find yourself a good person to be with because it will be a ride. That and finding out what you want to do if you don't know what it is that you want to do already.
Basically, I have wandered enough. It's time to get back on the horse and actually pull a EM (probably wont elaborate too much on that). What I mean by that is simply this: visualize what you want to do, take in all the info you can so you are knowledgeable about the said subject and start surrounding yourself with people who can get shit done. That way, when time comes to move and do shit, you are most of the way there.